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What if GMs were like Computers?
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03-04-2005, 01:44 AM
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#1 (permalink)
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HUSF Staff
cst is
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: LA County
Posts: 9,531
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What if GMs were like Computers?
at a computer expo (comdex), bill gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "if gm had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."
in response to bill's comments, general motors issued a press release stating:
if gm had developed technology like microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
1. for no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2. every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have tobuy a new car.
3. occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. you would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. for some reason, you would simply accept this.
4. occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. the oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "this car has performed an illegal operation" warning light.
7. the airbag system would ask "are you sure?" before deploying.
8. occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. every time a new car was introduced, car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. you'd have to press the "start" button to turn the engine off.
__________________
The quickest way to a man's heart is through Jack Bauer's gun.
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03-04-2005, 02:00 PM
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#2 (permalink)
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jstcrzyengh is
Join Date: May 2004
Posts: 2,201
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Aint it the truth brother!
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03-06-2005, 10:42 PM
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#3 (permalink)
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Active Member
IncredibleHuck is
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 452
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LOL I like the Macintosh comment!
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2 Corinthians 1:4
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03-07-2005, 04:09 PM
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#4 (permalink)
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Lifetime Member
PlatinumHooks is
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 11,744
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This is a well thought out joke...I like!
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03-07-2005, 06:14 PM
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#5 (permalink)
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Senior Member
Cuban_Fish is
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: fullerton
Posts: 1,289
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thats why gm's arent made like computers
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03-07-2005, 10:33 PM
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#6 (permalink)
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Member
tunakid is
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Anaheim
Posts: 1,266
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hahahahahahaha
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03-07-2005, 11:07 PM
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#7 (permalink)
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New User
vicki is
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Palo Alto
Posts: 13
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Quote:
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Originally Posted by cst
at a computer expo (comdex), bill gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated, "if gm had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."
in response to bill's comments, general motors issued a press release stating:
if gm had developed technology like microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
1. for no reason whatsoever, your car would crash twice a day.
2. every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have tobuy a new car.
3. occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason. you would have to pull over to the side of the road, close all of the windows, shut the car, restart it, and reopen the windows before you could continue. for some reason, you would simply accept this.
4. occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive - but would run on only five percent of the roads.
6. the oil, water temperature, and alternator warning lights would all be replaced by a single "this car has performed an illegal operation" warning light.
7. the airbag system would ask "are you sure?" before deploying.
8. occasionally, for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grabbed hold of the radio antenna.
9. every time a new car was introduced, car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
10. you'd have to press the "start" button to turn the engine off.
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I think I've had a car like that!
Vicki
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03-07-2005, 11:59 PM
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#8 (permalink)
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HUSF Staff
cst is
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: LA County
Posts: 9,531
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lol, im sorry to hear that vicki 
__________________
The quickest way to a man's heart is through Jack Bauer's gun.
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03-08-2005, 11:08 PM
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#9 (permalink)
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New User
vicki is
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Palo Alto
Posts: 13
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Well the problem is when I was young, I had an old car. Now that I'm old, I have a young car.
Oh well..
Vicki
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