This is hilarious

[DementedFish]

This is really really funny:

Some examples of why the human race has probably evolved as far as possible. These are actual instruction labels on consumer goods...

On Sears hairdryer:
Do not use while sleeping.
(Gee, that's the only time I have to work on my hair!)

On a bag of Fritos:
You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.
(The shoplifter special!)

On a bar of Dial soap:
Directions: Use like regular soap.
(and that would be how?)

On some Swann frozen dinners:
Serving suggestion: Defrost.
(But it's 'just' a suggestion!)

On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert: (printed on bottom of the box)
Do not turn upside down.
(Too late! you lose!)

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:
Product will be hot after heating.
(Are you sure? Let's experiment.)

On packaging for a Rowenta iron:
Do not iron clothes on body.
(But wouldn't that save more time?)(Whose body?)

On Boot's Children's cough medicine:
Do not drive car or operate machinery.
(We could do a lot to reduce the construction accidents if we just kept those 5 year olds off those fork lifts.)

On Nytol sleep aid:
Warning: may cause drowsiness.
(One would hope!)

On a Korean kitchen knife:
Warning: keep out of children.
(hmm...something must have gotten lost in the translation...)

On a string of Christmas lights:
For indoor or outdoor use only.
(As opposed to use in outer space.)

On a food processor:
Not to be used for the other use.
(Now I'm curious.)

On Sainsbury's peanuts:
Warning: contains nuts.
(but no peas?)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:
Instructions: open packet, eat nuts.
(somebody got paid big bucks to write this one...)

On a Swedish chainsaw:
Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.
(Raise your hand if you've tried this...)

On a child's Superman costume:
Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly.
(Oh go ahead! That's right, destroy a universal childhood belief.)

[fishinkid]

thats a good one i like the chainsaw one

[DementedFish]

Ok guys, I was just reading an instruction manual for a pencil sharpener and heres the quote, and I made the comment up myself.


"To prevent motor damage, remove the pencil from the pencil opening when the point is sharpened"
(No, I think i'll just leave my pencil in there for another 10 minutes.)




_

[tunakid]

i love that quote my me. anyone else ever get that urge?

[tunakid]

hmm guess im the only one

[Nirvana Fan]

I like the warning that a heavy iron like a Tady contains lead. (Like someone will actually eat that thing w/hook!)

[Nick Velvet]

Those are funny. Thing is usually the put the warnings because some dodo went and actually tried those things.

[sharkbait7]

this goes back to that other thread about all the stupid people that Sean posted yesterday